Can they give us paper every week? - The Square Ball 3/5/22
CHUCK 'EM!
Written by: Rob Conlon
As I got to my seat in the North East Upper on Saturday, a
fan on the row behind me had already started unfolding the white sheet of paper
attached to his. He was inspecting it in front of his face when he turned to
ask his friend, ‘Is this so we can hide from the match?’
Its use was explained when Leeds United and Manchester City
walked out at Elland Road, and two people standing in front of the East Stand
unfurled a banner with the instruction: ‘PLEASE RAISE CARDS.’ I felt slightly
insulted, as if we wouldn’t have been able to work that out ourselves, and then
there was no instruction for what to do afterwards. So as the banner was
lowered, what else were we meant to do? Chuck ‘em!
It’s not a great reflection of the season that it was
possibly the moment of 2021/22 that made me proudest to be a Leeds United fan.
All pettily defiant aren’t we? It’s why Gary Neville’s snivelling on Sky’s
commentary missed the point. Sure, the odd coin or bottle lid has been thrown
at a goading opposition player this season, but they were moments in isolation,
involving individuals. Give 15,000 people from Yorkshire (either geographically
or spiritually) a pound coin and they wouldn’t throw them at Jack Grealish —
he’s got enough already — they’d pocket the brass for themselves. The constant
avalanche of white, blue and yellow wasn’t thrown with the intention of
intimidating City’s players, but because it was as harmless as it was annoying
— not to mention hilarious. Even Grealish could laugh about it.
That’s why the half-time clean up only prompted an even
bigger tidal wave, particularly from the kids at the front of the East Stand,
relishing their crash course in LUFC 101: The Bastard Edition. Grealish
shielding himself in fear of a potential paper cut was funny, but I preferred
Raheem Sterling picking up one scrunched up ball to moodily volley it back into
the stand, only to completely slice it just a few inches. He needed a second
attempt, using the swipe of a grumpy teenager to boot it into touch, and was
rewarded with an ironic cheer.
There was nothing petty about the defiance of a ten-minute
chorus of We All Love Leeds only increasing in volume as the scoreline got
bigger, drowning out the away end’s celebrations while fans continued peppering
the recycling bin of the touchline. Again the message was being misinterpreted,
this time by our head coach’s triumphalist response. No noise can turn a 4-0
defeat into a win, Jesse. We’re doing our job, now the rest of the club needs
to do theirs. If the next few weeks don’t go the way we need them to, maybe
even fans in the West Stand will be bringing their own reams of office paper so
they can help create the fun the football isn’t giving us.
